Monday, March 16, 2009

put it on my tombstone.

I have no fear in telling the internetS that I was fairly accomplished in high school. There is no fear in sharing that because, first off, it's just a fact. Second, you can look it up and lastly, that was seven years ago and who the hell cares?

So, yeah, I was fairly accomplished in high school and I thought I was pretty cool. Then, I went to college and came to find out: everyone else was fairly accomplished, much smarter, a lot prettier and had dozens of purses to choose from on any given occasion.

The day I moved into my dorm room I knew I wasn't much when I saw the girl three doors down from me carry in a whole box of belts. A whole box of belts? I had two belts: black and brown.

Immediately, I had to think of something to set myself apart from the girl and her belt collection. I drove a '93 Corolla, so my car was out. I had a chi straightener, but so did half the dorm. Then, it hit me! I don't drink! That's it! I'll be the girl that doesn't drink alcohol. Oh, then I met some girls that quickly became my best friends and they didn't drink either. So, I made the decision that would forever shape me: I decided that I would never, ever, ever drink a beer. The barley and hops would never touch my lips (but, the vodka definitely would).

And now, at 25, that's my accomplishment: I've never consumed a beer of any kind. That, and I know the Presidents in chronological order.

Put it on my tombstone. Or not. It's whatevies, I'll be dead.

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