Tuesday, May 8, 2012

who are you.

Growing up, I was fairly certain I knew exactly who (and what) I wanted to be upon reaching the stage of mature adulthood.

No matter my age I was quite certain "mature adulthood" happened at your college commencement ceremony. [Let me assure you, adulthood may have happened, maturity did not.] And it's funny that up until your college commencement ceremony you know EXACTLY what you're going to do with your life, but about the time you sing the National Anthem you break into a cold sweat because you realize you have no idea how you're going to feed yourself or get healthcare.

Up until May 13, 2006 I was on my to Chicago. I was going to work in advertising as a copywriter and I was going to be awesome. I'd dabble in jingles, but not too much because I'm not a musician. I only wavered from this for a short span of time when I thought about going into full-time ministry.

Six years later, I've been to Chicago one time.
One time.
And. I'm not in advertising.
I don't even dabble in jingles!

Does this mean I haven't reached the stage of "mature adulthood"? Or does it mean I'm not who I thought I was going to be? Should I be looking in the mirror and asking, "who are you?"

I can say with a lot of certainty that I've reached a level of maturity that I would consider to be "mature" by most standards. Meaning, maybe I've turned into someone I didn't think I would ever be.

On top of all of this, sometimes I carry fruit in my purse as a snack.

And that, that scares me more than not ending up in advertising.
That is the one thing that makes me look in the mirror and say, "WHO ARE YOU?"

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