So, last night I'm watching the games of the 21st Olympiad. I made it through the brutality of women's snowboard racing (why don't they just call it a race on a snowboards? What does snowboard cross mean anyway?) and on to the short-program of "men's" figure skating.
Side note: The women's snowboarding was only brutal because poor little Lindsey Jacobellis (coolest last name ever?) was denied a medal. Poor little thang boarded through a gate or something and was disqualified. This came after we had been reminded every 30 minutes or so, for the last four days, that Jacobellis missed a gold medal in 2006 by falling right before she crossed the finish line. I'm confident she'll go on in life to be completely successful at something and I'm fine with that as long as she doesn't try to compete again in 2014. I do not want to see any more footage of her failing.
So, we're back to "men's" figure skating. First off, this has to be the absolute most loose definition of "men" ever. "Men" simply put is the plural form of "man." Well, they got that part correct. Here's where the loose plays in: